Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Ms. Bradshaw

I am obsessed with Sex And The City. I've tried to get into it before with no success but these days I guess everything's just a little more relatable (I guess a kinder way of saying, I'm not getting any younger).  

"There's some real truth about you. I can vouch for you."

I won't ever forget those words leaving my friend's lips. That's the best thing you could ask for in a friendship, I think. Every so often when I'm feeling down, I wonder what it is that I give to people that make me worth their time. Sometimes I get so clouded in my head I can't even remember who I am or what I want anymore. That's when it really helps, I guess.

I was on the right path when I first left home; I had life by the balls back then, but I was young, extremely naive, extremely happy and  about to make the worst decisions of my life. For some strange reason (that isn't so strange afterall), I turned my first priority to fixing a relationship that was never meant to have happened in the first place. For four years I did that. 

That's what happens when you and the guy have no common values and very different priorities -- if that wasn't obvious enough already. And then I decided to make the most retarded decision of my life by jumping into a relationship with a psycho. So.

I spent about 6 years focused on - not me. 

Point is, I never thought Carrie Bradshaw from Sex And The City would be a character I'd be relating to. She's a dream for any woman who neglected herself for so long and that - untameable side to her, so to speak. I'm probably romanticising that a little bit, but whatever it is, it isn't square.

Just finished the second season of SATC and it ends with some beautiful words from Carrie, as she watches her ex, Mr Big crawl into his limo with his new fiance. She says to herself:
"Then I had a thought. Maybe I didn't break Big. Maybe the problem was he couldn't break me. Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they need to run free, until they find someone just as wild to run with."

Until then.

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